<3

yesterday was amazing, it's the day i've waited so long for (: i stepped outta paya lebar station feeling mildly disappointed cos i thought i was the earliest again...and then i found zach and shuling camping on the steps! haha i can't find words strong enough to describe what i felt then...when they told me the lengths they went to in order not to be late (we were supposed to meet at 830. zach reached at 745 and shuling reached at 8 (: ) i was so touched i almost cried. i know it sounds kinda extreme....but it really, really made my day (:

QT by the beach is the most awesome experience ever.

today the cg went to just acia to eat haha! we were talking abt vday and the topic drifted to what we'd want our future partners to do for us. and wah the brothers are super...HAHAHA. i like winnie's statement! 'i always thought guys think with the lower half of their bodies, CAN YOU ALL PLEASE SHOW ME THAT YOU CAN THINK WITH BRAIN'. rofl i think they all failed to live up to that standard...hahahahahahaha...we laughed so hard we almost fell outta our chairs.

but. i still can't wait for vday! (:

posted by xin! @ 8:11 PM 0 Comments

i'm emily on the beam and you're sasha on the ground
you're telling me to fall and i'm not trusting you to catch me

tell me, who's gonna be the first to show some faith?

posted by xin! @ 10:41 PM 0 Comments

i think i need to learn to chill haha. like in that ares dance song we learnt in 08? slow down girl you're gonna hurt somebody.

anyway. i LOVED tuition today! hahaha. travelling to victor's house is a real drag but today was worth every bit. adara wanted to play with my phone but er i kinda remembered what almost happened to cal's iphone so i gave her my wallet instead haha. so she yanked out all the cards, passed them to me one by one for re-filing, then yanked them out again haha! okay she gets away with it cos she's cute...i never knew jingling coins could be so entertaining to anyone -.-
zyron was...haha just as annoying but cute as ever? i got a new kid, jonathan, hopefully he's staying cos we had alot of fun haha. i think they (ESPECIALLY ZYRON) exist just to drive me nuts? but honestly they're so entertaining that i can't stop laughing hahaha. now i know how ppl feel when im being nonsensical. and teaching them vocab is a breeze cos we play hangman while doing it!'

anddd. i broke the news to ralphael and lynn and i think they took it quite well haha. i feel like the more i talk about it, the happier i feel (: like suddenly, there is this huge load off my shoulders lol. lynn and i conveniently got lost during lunch and we spent a happy 3 hours posting mail, walking in the rain and drinking bubble tea haha. and we had a very enjoyable talk together...thanks dear (:

went back to DRC and jumped up down all over the place trying to crack a smile from the sternest OT there haha! and i managed to do it! YEAH MAN. after bouncing like a kangaroo in front of him boing boing boing. for the very first time since i joined bvh, i felt like myself again. happy and hyper and high yay. i'm gonna put the energizer bunny out of business.

haha and since i have nothing to lose now... next week, i'm gonna try to crack a smile from the most senior, most scary doctor there! =P hee. i bet i can show dr venga that doctors don't always have to be sad all the time. i'm gonna ... try and make all the doctors smile before i leave (:

posted by xin! @ 10:12 PM 0 Comments

after talking to lisa, i finally feel very at peace that medicine is not my cup of tea (:

i dont feel like writing it all down here cos i think my thoughts flow more when i log them in my journal. but if y'all wanna know why, ask me (: maybe i'll update here when i'm done. and tonight i'm seriously gonna sleep early. i keep nodding off on the mrt even when i'm standing up. RAWR.

posted by xin! @ 9:10 PM 0 Comments

nursing in the morning was so boring that i cant rmb much haha. i think i made some beds, watched the old lady in bed 30 engage in some colorful language and watched an NG tube being inserted/ pulled out (which explains the colorful language). used stethoscope to check for correct tube insertion.

afternoon...well...kinda blew my mind. previously, i didnt pay much attention to victor cos he brushes me off when i speak to him, and i wasn't sure if the motor accident had affected his thinking. this aftnn, though, sister toh told me his cognitive abilities were fully functional so i decided to give it another shot. and his story is just so sad...we hit it off and wound up chatting for almost 2 hrs, and he was telling me about his past life and what happened that fateful day. i mean, he's only 25 (i thought he was my age /: ) and other than the paralysis he's like any other regular kid. we watched dragonball, surfed facebook, looked at cg pics and photos of raptor when he was a baby....and i just kept thinking how sad it must be for him to always have people passing in and out of his life.

haiz.

posted by xin! @ 9:21 PM 0 Comments

Make It or Break It has got to be the most amazing show ever.

anw. i reached home at 4 pm cos the nursing shift ends at 3pm! muahaha shiok to the max. i shadowed the wounds nurse today...hmm. they warned me not to faint, but i still didnt expect it to be as bad as it was. didnt really scare me, but i honestly don't think my friends without FA training could have stomached the sight. stage 4 bed sores with exposed bones and tendons and stuff...i'll spare you the gory details.

posted by xin! @ 4:29 PM 0 Comments

i'm back (:

haha i really enjoyed today. honestly i was very spooked on the way home and when emily brushed sth off my shoulder i jumped so badly that mark made me sit the train to the end and bounce so he could pray for me...thank you everyone who talked to me and made me feel better (: we talked about random stuff on the way to get my mind off things and i really enjoyed it alot. thanks for trusting me. really. i'm listening to the song no boundaries by kris allen now haha. and thank you wanli for asking cal to call me (: it wasn't really what cal said that i appreciate (though of course i'm also happy that she talked to me la. lol). but because cal told me to call her when i reached home, i focused on that throughout my entire walk home alone and it kept my mind off being spooked.

okay there's alot of stuff i wanna say but no time no time...so can i just say that i really really liked moving house with mark mingwei kwok leong and emily today haha. and here's the lyrics to no boundaries.

Seconds hours so many days
You know what you want but how long can you wait
Every moment last forever if you feel you've lost your way
What if your chances are already gone
Started believing that I could be wrong
But you give me one good reason
To fight and never walk away

Coz here I am — still holding on!

Every step you climb another mountain
Every breathe it's harder to believe

You'll make it through the pain
Weather the hurricane
To get to that one thing

When you think the road is going nowhere
Just when you've almost gave up on your dreams
Then take it by the hand and show you that you can

You can go higher
You can go deeper
There are no boundaries
Above and beneath you
B-reak every rule coz there's nothing between you
And your dreams

Every step you climb another mountain
Every breathe it's harder to believe

Yeah...

There are no boundaries
There are no boundaries

With every step you climb another mountain
With every breathe it's harder to believe
Then take it by the hand and show you that you can

There are no boundaries.
There are no boundaries.
There are no boundaries.

i know what i want now. and i also know who to listen to. and i know and i know and i know that one day, what i want will come to pass. (:

posted by xin! @ 11:39 PM 0 Comments

i'm back early cos christine gave mark and i a lift home (: i'm really grateful to her...not just for the ride but also for the words she sowed into my life. i cant rmb exactly what it was, but i know it's sth i havn't heard for very long and sth which i needed to hear very badly.

physio today, talked to an amazing Catholic woman named Anna. she reminds me of one of the women in Captivating...although she's sixty with a badly fractured foot, her beauty just...shines through. radiates. when i talk to her, i feel this deep sense of peace and calmness washing over me. it's just beautiful to experience. heartwarming and soul-reaching.

went to chest physio in the aftnn, donned gloves, mask and apron cos i was in contact with some MNSR (or was it MSNR?) patients. i.e. they might be infected with viruses that can't be corrected with normal antibiotics. watched percussion and trachea suctioning up close, used the sthethoscope, learnt the proper way to don and remove protective gear and scrub my hands. thomas let me try out both the normal and lightweight wheelchair. and i learnt how to fold/ unfold it too! (:

i liked cg tonight alot too. too tired to contribute much but it was nice just sitting there and listening. just being in my friends' presence helps....i really really love the beach alot. favorite place ever. gonna go help mark shift house tmr.

g'night.

posted by xin! @ 12:36 AM 0 Comments

zzz. im so lazy to update. okay today....

shadowed dr jocelyn in the morning, she's super funny! Q: why do most doctors have messy handwriting? A: they forgot how to spell the names of the medicines, so they just scribble sth and try to make it look intelligent. i dont think she was joking, btw -.- one of the patients drank his own urine ): she was gonna hand me over to dr venga but hehe i kinda requested to go w another doctor instead cos i wanted more exposure. so anw, i had quite abit of trouble w the other doc's accent...i spent all morning wondering what on earth was internet medicine before i realised he was talking about internal medicine. and yea i couldnt figure out if his name was dr ong or dr wong...then he passed me a name card and turns out his name is dr maung. whoa. dig hole and hide. talked alotttttttt, watched suctioning of a trachea tube.

spent some times with the Compassion ahmas then went back to dr venga after lunch (: haha this patient celebrated her 92th bdae so her family called dr venga and i down just to eat cake :D a specialist consultant came down and gosh....i didnt see the stethoscope around her neck so i thought she was a visiting auntie! argh. thank goodness i just smiled and nodded and didnt say' hi auntie!' so mortifying. went through palliative care...saw alot more sad cases hai. the docs have mainly been asking me to translate english into mandarin and dialect haha. the nurses called up one patient's wife but they wanted me to do the translation for dr venga instead....and he agreed, how cool is that (: i love mingling with the different staff. have some stuff that i wanna say but it'll have to wait till i'm free.

planned for tuition and Ablaze on the bus, i'm almost done with Captivating whoo.i feel v strongly that i need to finish it before sat's mtg but ... ): ahh i'll try my best. shagged to the max, cya.

posted by xin! @ 10:43 PM 0 Comments

yay i finally shadowed the docs today (:

met dr lee in the morning and he was supposed to hand me over to dr jocelyn, but she wasn't available so i met dr jasmine instead :D she is super nice! very friendly and all. she's had 20 yrs of exp so it was really insightful learning from her. we made the morning rounds and i know pretty much most of the patients by now, so it's very cool to drop a smile or make a wave as you walk by and see the patients smiling back cos they recognise you. very sweet haha. the ahma i was doing OT with yesterday even waved me into her ward :D

dr jasmine handed me over to dr jocelyn a lil while before lunch, had lunch w e TCM helper and went off to look for dr venga. he was busy eating so he sent me to chill out alone first and since i didnt have anywhere to go, i went back up to Compassion Ward to find my favorite ahmas haha! they are so cute. most of the patients will just grab your hand and smile with their eyes if they're unable to talk...aww.

dr venga is really awesome. he's a junior doctor but he is so respectful to everyone around and he really taught me alot about medicine. i told him i wasn't a hundred percent sure if i wanted med due to the time commitment and he told me i'd better not follow this industry if i have plans for other areas of my life. he also told me that generally, doctors are not very happy ppl ): dr venga brought me for a consultant session with a new patient admitted for terminal lung cancer. its kinda sad to work in the palliative care ward but honestly, the quality of life the patients there have depends on how they want it to be. in the nursing home, there's this old lady who's super cheerful and such though she has no home and no family. yet you also see patients who curse and swear like there's no tmr although the docs are so nice to them and all.

went for tuition from amk to buona vista, read abit more of Captivating, slept all the way.

k i'm exhausted. night!

posted by xin! @ 10:24 PM 0 Comments

i did occupational therapy and speech therapy today (:

morning was OT (i get my own locker whoo) , kinda fun cos i was playing w many of the friendly patients i met yesterday hahah. and i practised my dialect with them also to try and brush up yup. went for lunch w lina, crashed in the OT room, went to attend a doctor's talk. i think i'm starting doctor's attachment tmr. am excited! (:

after lunch i went to shadow the ST. wow she is SO COOL. she has such a way with the patients and everything about her screams confidence. she can speak english, mandarin, malay, cantonese, teochew, hokkien, hainanese! haha im super impressed. i think she's one of the docs tht aren't impressed easily.

and in case you're wondering why i'm detailing every day of my attachment, its cos i'm too lazy to update my log now hehe. met twin after tht and she finally passed me Evangelism by Fire and Captivating whoo! the last time i read Captivating was in j1? haha. i think i really need to read it again but i don't really know why. hmm.

byebye!

posted by xin! @ 7:35 PM 0 Comments

yay i finished day 2 of MSW! (:

haha actually its not terribly exciting. i'm supposed to be shadowing the medical social workers' head for now and last friday we attended alot of multi-disciplinary meetings.toured the hospital, made friends with some patients, looked through case files etc etc. today i only attended one MDM but i got to do hands-on work for one case. richard taught me to draw the genogram, complete Means Testing, fill in the particulars, paste the stickers, fax the relevant stuff..kinda cool. haha i helped him count money that he collected from the staff too....that was scary la, i held like >$1000 in cash? omg. hahaha and he told me to call up some other place (i think it was a hospital), intro myself as a BVH member and settle some admin for him. cool ttm haha! felt super priviledged.

the hospital food is vegetarian which is kinda sad haha. the staff are served cafeteria-style so you just pay at the counter, get your receipt and pass your tray to the cook. it's usually soup, main dish, 3 sides, fruits, ice water...super filling and it's only 2bucks for everything. and my department ppl bring in their own food lol. richard treated me to lunch on fri and candice got hold of yam cake from i-dunno-where LOL.

then today, i visited the ward with yifen and the senior citizens there are super nice. they were complaining about the food (LOL) and they helped me brush up my dialect. and now i realise my dialect sounds so lousy cos i anyhow mix hokkien and teochew together hahaha. heck la i can't tell the difference.

oh and i filled in a discharge form today! think the guy is leaving tmr. and guess what i get to go with him and ride in the ambulance!!! HAHAHA. that's if mandy allows it cos i don't think i'll be shadowing MSW anymore tmr. prob nursing or sth. but i really hope i get to go!

posted by xin! @ 7:17 PM 0 Comments

hahaha today was very funny. we were going for lunch when i saw this thingy lookalike sitting under a car:


baby mynah!! from that dist i couldn't tell if it was a fledging or juvenile so i walked over to check if there were parents nearby. well, there weren't any that i could see so i asked fujie to help me get it out from under the car and back on the curb. the rest of the cg were in mw's van by then w/o realising what was going on so i think they were very shocked when they saw fujie wangliang and i chasing the baby across the road? haha! then somehow the lil toot decided to walk into the middle of the road and sit down while the vehicles were coming from both sides! omg. fujie and i dashed about like mad people trying to herd it back to the side hahahah! yea and i looked like a retard cos i was throwing my jacket everywhere trying to catch it. in the end i cornered it under a bush and took it back to mw's car...gave it my finger to bite so it would stop sqawking -_- kinda weird that the parents didnt respond to its HELPHELPHELP cries. hmm.

so...preliminary check...turned out to be a juvenile, pretty healthy, no sign of injury (: took it out one last time to check for parents. i looked super idiot can? i stood under the tree full of birds and yelled to catch their attention la. so in the end i guess mommy and daddy mynah FINALLY realised what was going on cos they swooped down...i decided to leave it in the shelter of the tree (: hope it doesnt decide to go jaywalking again lol.

posted by xin! @ 7:33 PM 0 Comments

posted by xin! @ 2:39 PM 1 Comments

i survived all the stress of yst and today! yay! haha im super proud of myself...thank you everyone who helped (:

oh...and she asked me to post sth fr prayer group cos she thinks its very funny. basically, we were choosing a name for ourselves and we wanted sth to do w 'on fire'. so everyone thought it'd be hilarious to name ourselves 'bbq' cos 1) it involves fire and skill 2) can tell new frens, 'hey! wanna come bbq w us?' HAHAH! so this led to us inventing a whole lot of new acronyms:

LOL: Love Our Lord (and reflects how we want pg to be a place full of joy and laughter! :D)

GTG: God To Go (meaning God's always w us)/ Go To God

GTGTG: Got To Go To God (daniel the smart aleck invented this -.-)

TTM: To The Max (nth new. just...TTM in doing His work)

TTYL: Talk To Your Lord

and zach suggested naming ourselves after Gobstoppers cos the different colors and tastes, coupled with the strength of the sweet, can reflect the different seasons in our Christian walk and the perserverance we should show. so interesting right?

haha in the end, we chose LOL as a short and amusing form but wanted a more formal name as well. so, the finalised form is:

Ablaze! (LOL)

hahaha i like it alot! shuling suggested adding the exclamation mark and i think it's very cool!

posted by xin! @ 12:06 AM 0 Comments

im so tired now and i don't understand why everyone's failing me
i don't understand why all the bombshells are falling all at once
but Lord if You say i'm ready, who am i to say i'm not

Oh,what I would do to havethe kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves
To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown
Where Jesus is,
And he's holding out his hand

But the waves are calling out my name and they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me time and time again
"Boy, you'll never win, you'll never win."

But the Voice of truth tells me a different story
the Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the Voice of truth says "this is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

Oh, what I would do to have the kind of strength it takes
To stand before a giant with just a sling and a stone
Surrounded by the sound of a thousand warriors shaking in their armor
Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand

But the giant's calling out my name and he laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed
The giant keeps on telling me time and time again"
Boy you'll never win, you'll never win."

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the Voice of truth says "this is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

But the stone was just the right size to put the giant on the ground
and the waves they don't seem so high from on top of them looking down
I will soar with the wings of eagles
when I stop and listen to the sound of Jesus
singing over me

But the Voice of truth tells me a different story
The Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
And the Voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me (calling out to me)
I will choose to listen and believe (I will choose to listen and believe)
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

I will listen and believe
I will listen and believe the Voice of truth
I will listen and believe
'Cause Jesus you are the Voice of truth
And I will listen to you.. oh you are the Voice of truth

posted by xin! @ 10:09 PM 0 Comments

i just saw this comment on zach's blog and i LOL-ed:

'Yea lunch was nice with the guys & watching Yiren get abused by xh.'

what can i say. i have extremely nice and accommodating guy friends hahahahaha.

posted by xin! @ 9:04 PM 0 Comments

the person from Bright Vision Hospital just called!!! haha argh i was eating dinner and i spat the entire mouthful back out when i heard the phone ring...ahhh!!! im so excited and nervous now. i'm meeting Dr Jean Ong tmr morning at 9.30 am. crap. i don't know what to wear! thank God i bought those new shoes with xy cheryl winnie aft service. ahhh. how do i prepare in one night? i'm gonna spend the whole night prepping Q&A. starting now! pls pray for me ppl (:

actually, i don't even know why i'm so excited. cos honestly i am not even sure if i want to do medicine cos of 1) cost of studies 2) commitment. and i don''t feel any particular calling towards it, except that i really really like the job scope. heh. my mom thinks she has 'alot of money' in the bank right now. i dont wanna be the one to tell her that it's not even gonna cover one year of uni fees. and even if i take a loan, its not fair to burden my family for so long. zz. we shall see (:

posted by xin! @ 7:25 PM 0 Comments

i've gotten 3 replies!!! :D :D :D

haha! yesterday night i finally decided to get off my ass and send out letters on enquiry to the various hospitals and cip stuff. all this time i've been delaying it cos i keep thinking, if my grades don't make it, my attachment work and travel fees would be wasted. so i kept kidding myself and thinking about doing cip instead (cos it'd also give you a chance to interact with patients, and even if i dont make it, at least i contributed to society right?) yet the fear kept me immobile and cos of it, i couldnt even go look for a job since i didnt know which days i'd be doing attachment (if any at all). but fear and faith cannot co-exist right? so grr i decided to stop running away from the prob and i realised that if my grades do make it and i fail cos my portfolio stinks, i wouldn't ever forgive myself...so i took a chance and contacted Bright vision Hospital, St. Luke's Hospital, Singapore General Hospital, National Heart Centre, National Cancer Centre and Institute of Mental Health.

so this morning...NCC replied! though they want me to send in my CV etc and i have no idea how to write it heh. can some kind soul who reads this pls come teach me? =P then in the afternoon, the guy from IMH called. and coolest of all, i just received a reply from BVH and the doctor wants to meet me in person! hahaha. actually, i think she might be out to grill me instead of encouraging me haha. but oh well, i'll just go give it a shot. and for IMH...the person told me to form a group before volunterring! and co-incidentally, our prayer group's been discussing about doing group cip so...haha! i hope it works out!!

posted by xin! @ 7:03 PM 0 Comments

sheesh. i'm playing my last card. i'm really gonna go perfect this look haha!


i did my QT and i feel v at peace now (: at long last i got the answer i wanted...i finally feel secure leaving my As results in God's hands :D

God's might can succeed where man's might cannot.

posted by xin! @ 2:58 PM 0 Comments

† Wanz™ ❤s tenacity and strength. says:
it is frequently said that camels store water in their humps for long dessert journeys. Analyse this statement on the basis of info on lipid metabloism and discuss whether it is a myth or fact.
!!!

xinhui says:
just write there
answer: myth
reason: cos my amazingly smart fren xinhui says so (:

HAHAHA

posted by xin! @ 12:31 AM 0 Comments

during PG, shuling asked a cool question haha. 'if faith without actions is dead....then how much action is considered action?' interesting right? hmm...i dunno, but i like to visualise talking to Jesus. if He asks me, 'eh. that thingy I asked you to do...have you done everything within your power to accomplish that goal?' and i can say confidently, 'yes!' then to me, that's considered sufficient action alr. (: not a tad less, not a tad more.

i keep reflecting on the part about seasons, and i really think that for me, this is the season of growth. it's like suddenly, everyone wants to sow into my life hahaha. in life, on msn, on the phone...i'm learning so much but i wanna learn so much more! i dont want to become saturated whoohoo! i feel like a beaker in chem lab that everyone is pouring different chemicals into. then maybe if the correct formula is found, something good can materialise from the stuff that's poured in haha!

and yea, i got quite alot of financial blessings this week (: my grandma gave me a hefty sum cos she wants me to 'xinhui ah, dress nice nice for cny and come let me see, ok?' hahaha. so yup i went shopping with jazz and got new jeans! my first pair of skinnys ever...i'll pair it w e shirt mark gave me if i can find the correct shoes by sunday lol. btw, i really think buying nice stuff for me is wasted. look what happened when calista came over:

cal: eh! what's that pink shirt in your closet
me: ? oh...wanli got it for me from her ocip trip. but its too big so i told her i'll wear as pyjamas
cal: o.o but that's a Tommy Hilfiger shirt!
me: which means...?
cal: it's a branded shirt!! and you told her you'll wear it as pyjamas??

HAHAHA. oh.my.gosh. i'm so sorry wanli! i really didn't know! hahahahahah...shucks...no wonder wanli looked so shell-shocked after my ignorant lil statement. rofl

yup and besides that, ken changed the batt on my computer and loaded new antivirus/ microsoft stuff so now it's ready to roll yay! plus he activated the speakers (i felt like the world's greatest retard when he told me the holes were speakers and not patterns) and added earpieces so i can listen to music online now (: to be honest, i was quite reluctant abt it cos i hate ppl messing around w my com. but ken was v insistent cos he said i can then listen to all the music tht my cg 'korkorjiejie' send me and 'increase my spirituality' haha! eh, its not just the older ppl lor...jeff also spams my hp with quite alot of songs (: but anw, thank you for all your hard work!

posted by xin! @ 11:10 PM 0 Comments

hehe, just came home from our first major prayer group mtg aft As. and i gotta say...it was AWESOME!! lol. much, much, much better than i thought it'd be, and we didn't even prepare much this time round (: we had a great attendance of 8/9! and for once, it felt like everyone was taking full participation in the meeting, and for every single decision made, all present took courage in voicing out their opinions =D met up at 8.20am to go for breakfast at macs, then trooped down to wcp to fly kites and climb the giant structures. oh, and it was super scary when daniel+ziang combined their strength to push me on the flying fox haha. i screamed >< daniel's kite flew away but some construction workers used a ladder to get him another one previously stuck in a tree haha!

went to jurong point for lunch, then emily and sharon helped me to print the songsheets while everyone showered. we used calista's cd for praise and worship this time round (it was my fault cos i didnt prep shuling in time to learn the songs ): ) but the presence of God was still terrific! we were smiling and laughing happily all the way through and once the sharing and meeting agenda began, everything just fell into place. it was just....amazing =D

guitaring prac w ben and shuling this friday...im so tempted to go get group wristbands from mount zion =D zach's setting up the blog tonight. we're going to pulau ubin for fellowship next week, followed by the usual prayer meeting and then a sleepover. i cant wait~!

posted by xin! @ 6:46 PM 1 Comments

today is one of those days when i want to throw away all my common sense haha. when i wish that i had an elder sibling around to play with me and listen to me and just be there for me. today is a day when i don't want to have to listen to a load of advice and how-i-should-behave-and-do-this-and-that or sit through a long lecture of which i already know e content. having knowledge and wanting to apply knowledge are two completely different things.

tmr's the first prayer group meeting in a long time, and i gotta focus. doesn't help that i had fever +headache+sore throat in the afternoon.

tuesday couldn't come fast enough.

posted by xin! @ 10:29 PM 0 Comments

GOD IS SO AWESOME!!!! above and beyond my wildest imaginations!!!!

haha! im so excited, i dunno what to type. i went to pets villa with zach today and met cal for lunch since i havn't had a chance to catch up with her for real long. and just like that, our talk lasted eight hours from ~2pm to 10pm! is that cool or what? i felt super blessed during dec cos i had chances to interact and learn from my leaders. but i don't think anything even came close to the kinda stuff we shared today! (= it's like....wow. finally,EVREY.SINGLE.THING. i've ever wondered/ worried/ felt about cell group matters is now out in the open. and its feels super good, yknow? being accountable. okay, i dont have words strong enough to describe how happy i am now. but it's like the best new year's gift from God i've ever had! my fire and passion to grow and learn has been rekindled. HALLELUJAH!

i'm off to do QT now and reflect about what i learnt today. awesome revelations. and a breakthrough that i never thought i'd have (not so fast or so willingly anw). my heart is totally filled with peace, joy and love right now...i really hope God uses us both abundantly to serve His Kingdom. I LOVE YOU DADDY!!

posted by xin! @ 11:12 PM 0 Comments